Studying Islam and Paganism part 1

I have decided, at least for right now, that I am studying Islam and Paganism/Wicca.  Both of these religions have something that draws me to them.  The very personal relationship with Allah and sisterhood one Muslimah to another draws me to Islam.  The freedom of Paganism and the rituals involved draw me to it.  (Note: I'm in a lot of pain right now so I can't be positive I'm making sense, though I do know what I mean to say.)  I am learning a few vocabulary words, such as Muslimah (a Muslim woman who lives for Allah) and hijab (the covering an observant Muslim man or woman wears).  Oh, and if you realize that I say something wrong about Islam or any other religion, as in I define a word wrong, please tell me.

I got the book Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner by Scott Cunningham from paperbackswap but I haven't started it yet.  The first book I read on Islam is Dr. Quanta Ahmed's In the Land of Invisible Women.  So many of my long held prejudices are breaking down as I learn more.  I'm gonna have to end this blog now, I'm in too much pain.  

My Personal Set of Beliefs

I've changed the name of my blog to "The Disillusioned Agnostic."  In my search for a religion right for me I've discovered some things about myself and what I believe, along with even more questions.  One thing I know; I am most certainly not Christian anymore.  I have very little respect for Christianity left.

I want to learn about different faiths and I think I'm getting somewhere.  I'm not getting far, but at least I can say for sure I'm not Christian.  I really don't think I'm going to become a convert to Judaism or Islam, but to be fair I'm not completely crossing them off the list before I explore them.  I do believe that there is a path out there for me, I just have to find it and nurture my faith.

I've decided the easiest way for me to figure this out is to sit down and make a list of what I DO believe in.

* I believe that all human beings are worthy of love.
* I believe that in the possibility of a God/Goddess.
* I believe in science.
* I believe that there is something more to life than science, that life has a mystical element.
* I believe that nudity is not "immoral" but natural.
* I believe that sex isn't something to feel guilty over.
* I believe that if there is a God/Goddess then He/She doesn't care what gender I'm attracted to.
* I believe in a sort of karma.
* I hold dear my love of the Virgin Mary even though I do not worship God.
* I believe in a woman's right to choose.
* I believe that plants and animals share the Earth with us, I don't believe that "God gave us rule over them."
* I do not believe in a faith that requires you to feel guilt and shame all of the time.
* I believe men and women are different in ways but the same in other ways.
* I absolutely do not believe women should be subjugated by men.
* I believe in the power of feminism.
* I believe that there are many spiritual paths for many people.
* I believe life is a celebration.
* I believe that meditation, including spiritual meditation, has a place in my life.
* I believe spirituality has a place in my life.
* I believe in learning.  I do not believe in a faith that I am not supposed to know the answers OR questions to. If that makes sense to you then you were probably Catholic at some point in your life.
* I do not believe in Heaven, Hell, or Purgatory.
* I believe in the possibility of reincarnation.
* I believe in personal responsibility.
* I believe that spirituality can be practiced in a group and/or by one's self.
* I do not believe in a Higher Being that judges us and/or sends us to eternal damnation.
* I believe that we are all one people and many people.
* I believe that being on the top of the food chain does not make us rulers of the earth.
* I believe we all have something that makes us who we are that goes beyond biology.
* I believe in ghosts and spirits.
* I believe in extra-terrestrial life. I mention this because as a Christian many times I was told that the belief that we aren't the only ones in this world clashes with belief in God. That's pretty narcissistic, don't you think?  I never agreed but then go figure, I have a thinking brain.
* I am not sure how I feel on good vs. evil. I think it is something that I need to explore all by itself.
* I believe that ALL human beings have the right to not live in fear.
* I do not believe in the Bible. I am making this clear because the only proof people can show me of Christianity is the Bible. That means nothing to me. You are proving my point, not yours, when you do this.
* I believe that religion has possibly caused more problems than it ever solved.

Well it is almost midnight, so I'm going to leave off here.  I'll try to write more on this again soon.  It isn't something I can blog daily about because exploring my spirituality is a long, slow process.  It should be a long, slow process.  I do not want to rush that process to get out another blog.  This is very important to me.  I hope everyone has a great week.